Opposites sometimes attract but are always needed
I think everybody has a friend that they have very little in common with. I know I have one. They like Country Music and I definitely do not. I like going to new restaurants and trying new foods especially if they are spicy. They like to go to the same restaurants to get the same food and it is never spicy. I like sports. I like to watch sports, play sports, talk sports and everything else sports. They could care less about sports. They like the beach and I am more of a mountain man. They like hanging by the pool and shopping. I would rather have a burning stick stuck in my eye than do either of those activities. I enjoy watching movies. They only watch movies on Lifetime (You know the man hating channel.) and Christmas movies. They love Christmas and decorating for Christmas. They even listen to Christmas music all year long. I suffer through Christmas. (See earlier blog.) I think making the bed is optional and a few dirty dishes in the sink never hurt anybody. They clean from sun up to sun down. They vacuum twice a day even if nobody walked on the floor. They are always cold so they like to sleep with lots of blankets with the heat turned up. I am always hot so I sleep with the air conditioning, a ceiling fan, and a personal fan all turned up high.
From hearing all the things we don't have in common you would think we spend very little time together but it is the exact opposite, I married this friend. She has become my very best friend. We do not let the things we don't have in common become an issue. Now from time to time they have caused a bump in the road and an occasional war. (How was I supposed to know that a dirty food container that was left in my car for a week or two was not supposed to be put in the sink with the other dirty dishes? I learned that lesson early in our marriage.)
What we do have in common is what makes our marriage strong. We both love God and love serving Him. We enjoy doing simple things like sitting in a rocking chair at the Island in Pigeon Forge watching the water show and talking. We both love our daughter and want to do everything we can to make her the best she can be. Family is very important to both of us. We made it our goal that we would not have "his family" and "her family" instead we would have our family. Our in-laws dine together on a regular basis without us so it is safe to say we reached that goal.
Sometimes it is our differences that help us grow closer and accomplish great things. Lisa is the organizer and planner of the family. She plans out every detail and puts it on the calendar. I add the creativity to calendar. I see a Tuesday night at home just the two of us and I turn it into date night. I only know that night is free because of her planning and organization. I sometimes run ahead filling in the details as I go. She is sometimes slow trying to figure out too many details. So together we walk at a good pace. Her caring heart takes care of things I don't see or would ignore. My positive personality helps her to see the good in a situation. I make messes (not on purpose, it just happens especially when I am wearing a white shirt) and she is there to clean them up. God put us together because He knew my weaknesses were her strengths and her weaknesses were my strengths.
What we learned early in our marriage is that it can't be all about me or all about her. It has to be all about us. We make our decisions not based on what I like or what she don't like but on what will be best for us. So I go shopping with her and she watches sports with me. I go to the beach and she goes to the mountains. We sometimes go to the same old place (Outback) and sometimes go to a new place (She recently tried Paula Dean's place with me in Pigeon Forge which ROCKED!) We use the strengths of each other to over come the troubles we face. We lean on each other instead of knocking each other down. The goal is to have a God glorifying marriage not to have my way all the time. So our differences are needed to complete this goal. Neither one of us could do it alone and there would be no way to do it if we stayed at odds while trying to hold on to our likes and ways.
That is the way it is in churches also. You have opposites sitting beside each other on the same pew. You have those holding on to tradition mingling with those looking for the latest things. You have those who want to run without caution and those who want to crawl with over caution traveling the same path. You have those who focus only inward and those who only focus outward when ministering. Some say "Thou shalt" and others say "You should" but they are all saying the same things. When a church learns to use the strengths of each member then both spiritual growth and physical growth can be obtained. It is not all about my likes or your gifts or their desires. It is about glorifying God in all that we do. It is about spreading the gospel to those who need it both in and out of the church. You may enjoy one method more because it appeals to your likes and talents but that doesn't make it the only method. As long as the MESSAGE doesn't change then the method can but it doesn't have to just for the sake of change. The goal of the church shouldn't be to have "my" method and "their" method but to have "our" method which includes both and meshes them together to form one method. Instead of battle lines being drawn mergers need to be made. After all God didn't put opposites in the same church to argue, He put them there to serve Him together as one body, His body.
Parting Thought: Have you ever noticed that woman's "I'll be ready in15 minutes" and a man's "I'll be home in 5 minutes" are the same? Both over an hour.
From hearing all the things we don't have in common you would think we spend very little time together but it is the exact opposite, I married this friend. She has become my very best friend. We do not let the things we don't have in common become an issue. Now from time to time they have caused a bump in the road and an occasional war. (How was I supposed to know that a dirty food container that was left in my car for a week or two was not supposed to be put in the sink with the other dirty dishes? I learned that lesson early in our marriage.) What we do have in common is what makes our marriage strong. We both love God and love serving Him. We enjoy doing simple things like sitting in a rocking chair at the Island in Pigeon Forge watching the water show and talking. We both love our daughter and want to do everything we can to make her the best she can be. Family is very important to both of us. We made it our goal that we would not have "his family" and "her family" instead we would have our family. Our in-laws dine together on a regular basis without us so it is safe to say we reached that goal.
Sometimes it is our differences that help us grow closer and accomplish great things. Lisa is the organizer and planner of the family. She plans out every detail and puts it on the calendar. I add the creativity to calendar. I see a Tuesday night at home just the two of us and I turn it into date night. I only know that night is free because of her planning and organization. I sometimes run ahead filling in the details as I go. She is sometimes slow trying to figure out too many details. So together we walk at a good pace. Her caring heart takes care of things I don't see or would ignore. My positive personality helps her to see the good in a situation. I make messes (not on purpose, it just happens especially when I am wearing a white shirt) and she is there to clean them up. God put us together because He knew my weaknesses were her strengths and her weaknesses were my strengths. What we learned early in our marriage is that it can't be all about me or all about her. It has to be all about us. We make our decisions not based on what I like or what she don't like but on what will be best for us. So I go shopping with her and she watches sports with me. I go to the beach and she goes to the mountains. We sometimes go to the same old place (Outback) and sometimes go to a new place (She recently tried Paula Dean's place with me in Pigeon Forge which ROCKED!) We use the strengths of each other to over come the troubles we face. We lean on each other instead of knocking each other down. The goal is to have a God glorifying marriage not to have my way all the time. So our differences are needed to complete this goal. Neither one of us could do it alone and there would be no way to do it if we stayed at odds while trying to hold on to our likes and ways.
That is the way it is in churches also. You have opposites sitting beside each other on the same pew. You have those holding on to tradition mingling with those looking for the latest things. You have those who want to run without caution and those who want to crawl with over caution traveling the same path. You have those who focus only inward and those who only focus outward when ministering. Some say "Thou shalt" and others say "You should" but they are all saying the same things. When a church learns to use the strengths of each member then both spiritual growth and physical growth can be obtained. It is not all about my likes or your gifts or their desires. It is about glorifying God in all that we do. It is about spreading the gospel to those who need it both in and out of the church. You may enjoy one method more because it appeals to your likes and talents but that doesn't make it the only method. As long as the MESSAGE doesn't change then the method can but it doesn't have to just for the sake of change. The goal of the church shouldn't be to have "my" method and "their" method but to have "our" method which includes both and meshes them together to form one method. Instead of battle lines being drawn mergers need to be made. After all God didn't put opposites in the same church to argue, He put them there to serve Him together as one body, His body.
Parting Thought: Have you ever noticed that woman's "I'll be ready in15 minutes" and a man's "I'll be home in 5 minutes" are the same? Both over an hour.
Comments
Post a Comment